Hunks

Oh yeah, I'm a hunk. Sadly, not in the way you, dear readers, are probably hoping.

Coming out of high school I was a lean, mean, fighting ma...well, lean machine. Finely toned at 6' and 150 pounds, I was...well, lean. Being a curmudgeon and therefore abjectly averse to exercise in any way, shape or form, I slowly lost the "lean" bit.

Pinch an inch? I can do that on an arm. Love handles? I'm way beyond that, unless your hands are like André the Giant's. I sure am glad they invented "comfort fit" waists and "relaxed fit" shirts. My fear is that I will soon be old enough to appear in public in sweat pants and get away with it.

It's a damned good thing Skittles hadn't been invented back when I was in high school.