Curmudgeons Abroad

Let's face it, foreign travel is not for curmudgeons. Even if we could tolerate the actual getting there bit, we would probably starve once there.

There is no safe haven abroad - England? They boil EVERYTHING. Scandinavia? Do you KNOW what gravlax or finnan haddie are? Greece? Yeah, we're going to eat yogurt and figs. Pressing on, un-Americanized Italian or Mexican would no doubt be deadly, and let's just cross India (how spoiled IS this curried meat?) and Japan (you didn't COOK this fish?) and China (why is my dinner moving?) right off the list.

Aah, give us good old American cooking. Like Denny's...or Taco Bell. Beautiful!