Texting

My fellow batty old curmudgeons have barely grasped the concept of mobile phones, so it comes as no surprise that issues surrounding texting are pretty high on their list of confusing issues (a la "What's all the fuss about this phone texture thing?"). As their technology go-to guy, I've done some investigation. Apparently texting can be a useful adjunct to calling people. But, as with anything new, it has hatched its share of problems:

Auto-correct. Seeing what this feature has done to some messages, I swear it will inadvertently start a war some day. Texters are astonishingly inept at seeing what their message actually says before hitting "send."

Texting shorthand. The English language doesn't need a new form of degradation - it has quite enough already, thank you very much.

Texting while driving. This is no doubt the single stupidest cellphone-related thing someone can do. It is leaps ahead of applying makeup, setting your GPS, trying to dial a cell phone and similar things while driving, which are really stupid by themselves.

Texting while walking about in public. This has become a highly entertaining spectator sport, given how often these nitwits walk into things whilst texting.

Texting by teens. It has become such an epidemic among them (50-60 texts per day, AVERAGE) that the smarter ones tell their friends good night long before retiring so they can finally have some uninterrupted peace.

Texting by Curmudgeon. Not bloody likely.