Code 5

The curmudgeon was recruited by Western Electric for his computer knowhow…pause…1971 computers

Don’t laugh.  OK  laugh a bit.

Real-time operating systems were pretty much unheard of, but the early computer-controlled telephone switching systems, as you might imagine, needed them.

And when they got sick, it was up to the curmudgeon to fix them.  Never mind that they seemed to get sick at 2 am, and the curmudgeon had to race down to repair central – Newark – at a time when even the cops were scared to be out and about.

After every attempt to diagnose the problem, if the computer refused to come back up, there was a final solution – code 5.

Actually, this was pushing a single button on the control panel.

The curmudgeon experienced his first Code 5 in some godforsaken neighborhood in Brooklyn.  Push the button, wait for the computer to zip through startup, and hope for the best.  Well, startup was a little more – the computer had to zip around the Central Office it was running to assure itself all else was OK. Fine and dandy.  The design of COs at the time were a blend of old and new technology – the computer being the new bit, but relay technology being a critical piece of the CO.

So when the computer finished deciding it was sane, it would turn to these relays to see if they were OK.  It turned out that that meant firing them all, not in a quiet 1-by-1 sort, but all 10,000 at once.  The floor literally shook – and we’re talking cement here.  The change in your pocket would rattle.

Life was never the same.