Eggs Benedict

For those of you unfortunate culinary-challenged types, Eggs Benedict are literally worthy of dying. 

Eggs Benedict are the creation of some culinary God, and each slice of that buttery, egg-yolk-soaked butter sauce simply transports. 

Then there is the Canadian Bacon. Canadians are nice enough people, but anything in America with "bacon" attached, means bacon. Fatty, salty, stuff that make bacon cheeseburgers and things that Denny's can only invent in our dreams.  

NOT the Canadian stuff in the slightest. Fat-free, flavor-free, tough as any Canuck, it is an abomination.  

Now, American bacon eggs Benedict - one is transported: primarily to the nearest hospital. 

But, boy, was it good. 

Luther Gillis

This is for you Magnum, PI, err "Private Investigator" fans:  a recurring character, Luther Gillis, a hard-boiled, old school (let's be honest here: beat up lots) detective from St. Louis. 

"Character" hardly does him justice. In all of his three Magnum episodes, he is, well, Luther Gillis, and never disappoints. Curmudgeons love a good hard-boiled detective. Mickey Spillane, Sam Spade, Matt Hammer. All hard-boiled... and all beat up a lot. Better them than us; we're not idiots, just crotchety old curmudgeons living in la-la land.

A favorite moment: Magnum is reading something from a computer printer (these were the 80s). "I got it" he exclaims - "the same dot printer!"

Luther: "Who is this Dot Printer and what does she have to do with things?"

Give me my laughs.

So, if watching a georgeous hunk in Hawaii appeals to you, Luther Gillis episodes (clearly NOT the hunk) episodes 4/2, 4/16, and 5/10 for you Google challenged (my primary audience - they're still trying to figure out where to find this "Google" thingie) are a delight. 

Enjoy. 

Technology Fatigue

As the technology guy for the Curmudgeon Societé Generale, I'm expected to answer all manner of technological questions. Luckily, they mostly have to do with how flip phones work. 

But here on the home front, I test everything. Since the Societé is paying, I test everything you can imagine. TiVo, Roku, Chromecast, Sony DVRs, you name it. What the hell do they know?

One technology I use is my iPhone sending TV shows through my Apple TV. Works flawlessly. You dial up the show on your phone, push this little transmit button, and voilá! TV. 

Worked flawlessly. Now there's AirPlay, and as convenient as it may be, I'm used to pushing the little icon on my phone that gets the show going. No more. The icon is missing, I panic, and the show doesn't do diddlysquat until I go into a push up menu and push "AirPlay". It works fine, but heeby jeebies, I'm 65 and changing comfortable thingies can be annoying. 

Like deciphering the buttons on your new microwave. Were these invented by sadists?

This must stop. Either these things should tell you in plain English what is expected (remember, I'm the technology guy and this is simple stuff), or the warranty should cover you tossing the entire device into the stream in the backyard. Simple. Effective. 

You don't ever want to cross an angry curmudgeon. 

It Would Now Appear I Have No Appreciative Readers

Despite being a technology-challenged curmudgeon, I do get to see what countries like to read my blog. BTW, the US rules!

I am always pleased when new ones appear - maybe I resonate here and there. (Thank you, France). 

But way more importantly: I get zero comments, people, from any of you - zero. On target? I don't know. Vaguely humorous? I don't know. Hitting a resonating topic? I don't know. I get zero feedback, which shouts a clear message: nobody really cares and no point in continuing. 

I don't even have a clue that I'm furthering the curmudgeon philosophy (which I invented for fun).

I will hit 1000 blogs next month. Even an idiot like me knows when to stop. That will be it. For those of you that enjoyed my musings, it makes me glad (despite absolutely zero feedback), but it seems I've made no difference nor made anyone feel any better, so it is time to quit. 

I sigh. I did try. 

23

My man cave is equipped with a 48" TV. Some of you (my fellow Curmudgeon Societé Generale members not so much) might not think that is very big. Let me assure you, from 6' away, it is nearly IMAX. 

It was an early model. Surprise of all surprises, the speakers are in the front. Wonders of wonders, you can HEAR things, like dialog and such. A TV-wide built-in speaker bar where sounds from the left sound like they're coming from outside the house are included. 

When I got it, volume setting 23 was perfectly adequate - enough to hear everything and not so much that certain Sainted wives would yell from adjacent rooms. 

These days, 23 doesn't cut it. Neither 26, 28 nor any of the 20s. I think the amp must be going bad...can't be my aging hearing.